A Prague Spring

Full moon over Bohemia.
The overtime clock is ticking.
The first time I came to this Golden City,
I had blonde hair,
was dating a girl from Nottingham
and had only recently visited my first internet porn site.
These things I remember.
Not the bright lights
and coffee bars on the banks of the Vlatva
for me this time around,
but rather the constant re-jig of the Kino-flo
and the endless plastic cups of Liptons Yellow Label.
The director of photography is from Holland.
He's slow. I mean reeeeeeeally slow.
His name, and I kid you not, is Rutger Storm.
Last night, the French advertising agency
kindly organised a thai massage for me.
They told me there would be a 50/50 chance
of my masseur being male or female.
At a little after 9:30pm,
a burly man called Michal knocked on the door to my room
and asked me to strip-down to my underwear.
Turns out he wasn't even from Thailand.