Keep it to yo selves

I'm used to David Arquette's verbal diarrhea when it comes to his marriage with Courteney Cox being all full of problems and shit, but I didn't expect it from her??

The separated couple went on Howard Stern together today and the Scream 4 actress went off on her husb's erectile issues.  It's not that he has a problem getting it up... it's that he's ALWAYS hard.



She was all (via US Weekly), "This is one of our problems in our relationship. Whenever I would need consoling from David, he could not literally put his arm around me for one second without completely getting a boner."



As proof, she refers to the time her father had cancer saying, "[He] was like, 'Oh, I'm so sorry your Dad is dying. Can we fuck?'"



Courteney also revealed that he tried to sex her up in Disney World where they took their 6-year-old daughter Coco recently.  Better not have been in front of Mickey Mouse!  David tries to defend himself saying it was early in the morning (we all know what happens then) as he explains, "I'm always ready for [Courteney]," adding on a more serious level, "I know I'm more in touch with what she needs now... She takes one sort of thing and she clumps it [and says] that's what happens all the time in our relationship. It's not really true."

Courteney cuts in, "Disney World just wasn't the right time and I don't want to confuse the issue. We're going through a hard time."  She continues, "You can't count Disney World as the place where you know I'm not into you. I had just woken up. I don't think [sexual attraction] is the issue. The truth of the matter is that we love each other so much. We have such affection for each other but we are very different."



At one point David said to his wifey, who insists she hasn't gotten it on with anyone else since him, "I think you're over it, baby. You just need to admit it and we just need to figure out next steps."



This is the weirdest breakup.  I feel stressed out and I'm not even in this relationship!  Even they don't know what they are, which is a confusing mess.  David clearly wants back on that while Courteney is resentful as hell, yet can't let go.  It kind of seems like she's stringing him along as punishment.  I don't know, and I don't want to know, but they're the ones airing out their dirty laundry. And it STANKS.



So, since this is none of my biz, I'd appreciate it if you'd shut-up in public from now on, especially about anything boner related.  Try booking an appointment with a marriage counselor next time.  Like, your daughter is going to read about this one day... GROSS.

David Arquette is in rehab

No wayyy... David Arquette has a problem with alcohol.  But he seems so normal and so NOT drunk ever?

A couple of months after separating from his wife, the actor has entered Lindsay Lohan's former joint (horrible word choice), the Betty Ford centre.  TMZ reports he's there for alcohol addiction and depression.  Awe.  He's just not handling his breakup well.  Aweee...



Courteney Cox says she loves and supports him.  AWEEE.  Just get back together.

Courteney Cox is not getting a divorce. Okay...

Courteney Cox has spoken out for the first time since announcing that she and husband David Arquette have separated...

The Cougar Town star tells Australia's TV Week (via People), "This is not like we're getting divorced."  Uhhh, okay.  Despite the fact that David is walking around sleeping with other women and calling himself single, his wife says, "This is a separation and I think that takes a lot of courage... Whatever is supposed to happen will be the best thing for us."



So you're on a break then right??  After 10 years of Friends, I still don't think anybody knows exactly what that means...

Courteney and David split

After 11 years of marriage, Courteney Cox and David Arquette have separated.

The actor tells Howard Stern on his radio show that he and his wife started to drift apart right after their 11th anniversary.  David says Courteney gave him a motorcycle and said, "I don't want to be your mother anymore."  OUCH.  (They have a 7-year age difference.)  And about a month before they started to film Scream 4, they stopped having sex.  After they wrapped filming, they decided to do a trial separation.



David explains in their separation, they made an agreement that they could see other people.  And he confirms TMZ's reports that he had slept with a younger woman, Jasmine Waltz, 28.  But only after he was a "single man".  He also had his suspicions that his wife was having an affair with her Cougar Town co-star, Brian Van Holt, but she denied it.

In a LONG ASS statement to US Weekly, Courteney and David say, "We have agreed to a trial separation that dates back for some time. The reason for this separation is to better understand ourselves and the qualities we need in a partner and for our marriage. We remain best friends and responsible parents to our daughter [Coco, 6] and we still love each other deeply.



"As we go though this process we are determined to use kindness and understanding to get through this together. We are comfortable with the boundaries that we have established for each other during this separation and we hope that our friends, family, fans and the media also show us respect, dignity, understanding and love at this time as well."



At least Jennifer Aniston has a single friend to hang out with now...