Pink has a baby girl

Pink and Carey Hart are now officially cool parents as the singer has announced the arrival of their newborn daughter.

She tweets, "We are ecstatic to welcome our new beautiful healthy happy baby girl, Willow Sage Hart. She's gorgeous, just like her daddy. #beyondblessed"



Willow is a cute, normal name. But every time I hear it now I just think of this:

Arnold's secret kid found out the hard way

I was worried this would happen. When Arnold Schwarzenegger announced to the world he made a baby almost 14-years-ago after banging the housekeeper, that was also the first time his secret son found out. That sucks so much. Can you say therapy?

You'd think this guy would have maybe given this Mildred Patricia Baena broad time to give the poor kid a heads up instead of this: "Oh hey, my mom is all over the internet! Hey that looks like my face blurred out. Wait-- who's my daddy??" But TMZ says Maria Shriver leaked the story to the media out of pure rage so that might have something to do with not having any time to sit the boy down and explain how affairs ruin lives...



Also, the dude who until recently had no reason to believe he wasn't the child's father found out the shitty way too. Rogelio Baena tells Entertainment Tonight he thought this whole time the kid was his biological son. For him it's a double betrayal as he says Schwarzenegger was his hero. Awww!! But still he says to the boy, "I am your father. That's all." That's RIGHT.

But there's more. The NY Post reports the 13-year-old refers to Alex Aguiar, mom's current man, as "dad"... It's like a freakin' dad triangle! Whatever, it just means more presents on your birthday. Repress the rest.

Arnold's babymama revealed

And of course it only took a day to track down the identity of Arnold Schwarzenegger's housekeeper whom he had an affair and a child with...



Multiple media sources online are all acting like they found the photos first, but seriously, they all just grabbed it off her MySpace page. YOINK.



So her name is Mildred Patricia Baena but the son (turns out he's 13 --someone dug up his birth certificate) is thankfully getting some privacy. His name is not being revealed and his face is blurred on every photo. But you can totally tell anyway that he looks just like daddy!

E! News has come up with a timeline of the affair and in a disturbing twist, it's been discovered that Schwarzenegger's wife Maria Shriver and their household employee were pregnant at the same time and gave birth to their sons only five days apart-- Maria's on September 27, 1997 and Mildred's on October 2, 1997. You don't think infidelity can get much worse but I think that just made it worse.



And in case you need to know anything else, TMZ is obsessed with the story posting pretty much any photo they can find of Mildred including baby shower photos, even old Halloween photos because yes, it's all relevant... Next, I'm sure they'll share footage of the child birth.

Illegitimate Schwarzenegger

There is a 10-year-old Schwarzenegger running around. Arnold and his wife Maria Shriver have four children together between the ages of 13 and 21 but it's now been revealed that someone messed around with the help and made another one...

The former Governor of California has confirmed that more than a decade ago, he fathered a child with a household staff member. He kept this shit on the down low all this time despite the fact that the woman worked for their family for 20 years! She retired in January with a sweet severance package and has been gettin' paper ever since the UH OH was born.



Betrayed by your husband AND your nanny / maid / whatever she was? Shit. Just walking around all pregnant in front of you acting like it's her own husband's baby... And she was probably one of those mothers who never shuts up about her baby either, and totally to Maria's face too. And she had no idea the whole time! Nope, she didn't stay quiet to save her gropey husband's political career or anything like that because Arnold didn't even admit it until he left office, yet this whole thing happened before he even ran. It's true! TRUE LIES.



According to the L.A. Times, this is what he has to say for himself (and yes you MUST read it in an Austrian accent. That's Austria, not Australia, it'll ruin everything if you hear the Crocodile Hunter's voice [RIP] in your head):

"After leaving the governor's office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago. I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry. I ask that the media respect my wife and children through this extremely difficult time. While I deserve your attention and criticism, my family does not."

Maria's statement reads (via People):

"This is a painful and heartbreaking time. As a mother, my concern is for the children. I ask for compassion, respect and privacy as my children and I try to rebuild our lives and heal. I will have no further comment."

She is so done with him. Look, she even cut his cheating, baby-making ass out of the statement. Lying for 10+ years?? Hasta la vista, dirtbag.

Way harsh

Alicia Silverstone has given birth to her first child and People reports she named the poor boy Bear Blu. Oh? Is he a teddy bear from a childrens storybook who has a case of the sads?

But usually, when I think of someone who people call "Bear", I think of the Urban Dictionary definition: "A term used by gay men to describe a husky, large man with a lot of body hair" --not the furry woodland creature.



And Blu? WHY? It's not even French for "blue" that's "bleu". So did you conceive him to Blu Cantrell's "Hit 'Em Up Style (Oops!)" or something?







You're welcome for putting that song in your head for the next 24 hours whether you pressed play or not!

Monroe & Moroccan

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon have revealed the names of their twin babies...

The girl is Monroe Cannon, of course named after Marilyn Monroe, an "inspiration" to Mariah her whole life. Plus, she owns the late Hollywood legend's white piano which she purchased in an auction. Pfft... I have a brown piano.



But baby Monroe is middle-nameless because her mama also does not have a second name. Why do I feel like she is deprived? But she'll sure as hell have everything else she wants in life.



The boy has been named Moroccan Scott Cannon. I know, MorocCAN? Why not just Morocco? Is he a type of food? But there's meaning there too...



According to CNN:

"The top tier of Mariah’s New York City apartment is called the Moroccan Room, because of the Moroccan-inspired decor. It’s also the place where Nick proposed to his wife, overlooking Manhattan!"

K fine, that's cute. Minus the part where "can-can" is in his name. Moroc-Can-Can-non... yep. BUT they're going to call him Roc for short. Love that. And they chose middle name Scott because it's Nick's middle name AND his grandmother's maiden name. See? They have reasons?



Sooo... Do you need a penthouse to name your kids after a room? Because right now all I've got going on is Master, Bathroom, Laundry, Office, Linen Closet...

Mariah and Nick tease their baby names

They are so adorably cheesy. Mariah Carey and her husband Nick Cannon became first-time parents to twins this weekend. And now their names are a mystery with a capital M.



Let me break down how we got here:

• People reports a boy and a girl arrived on Saturday April 30, which just so happened to be the married couple’s third wedding anniversary.


• After the babies were born, Mariah and Nick listened to her hit-song “We Belong Together”. Oh my God they would.


• The next day, the new father tweeted that Rev. Al Sharpton paid a visit to the hospital to renew his and his wife’s vows, which they do every year.

Like I said, they're ridiculous but that's how they roll cause they's in LOVE.

Of course, these two are known for teasing everything about these babies so far -- the pregnancy announcement, the twins announcement, the twins sex announcement... and now the twins names announcement is coming BUT not without a hint first.



Mariah tweeted she wanted her fans to try to "guess" the names before they tell the world and had said, "both begin w/M's!!!! : )"



EASY. Mariah the II and Mariah the III. Or Mariah and Mick. I win.

January Jones is preggo

January Jones is looking forward to being a single mom as People reports she's pregnant.

A rep for the Mad Men actress said in a statement, "January Jones is happy to announce that she is expecting her first child this fall."



They haven't said who the father is, but wasn't she doing Jason Sudeikis not too long ago? Is he being a deadbeat daddy already? Is this going to be one of those things where we never know? I can't help it, I'm nosey.

Jersey Shore baby

Probably the last Jersey Shore cast member you would expect to become a parent... Angelina Pivarnick.

TMZ announced the former MTV reality star is pregnant as she confirmed the news the website herself. The baby’s father is said to be Dave Kovacs (well I'd hope so seeing as he's been her fiance since February.) A due date hasn’t been revealed though so who knows how far along she is.



Maybe motherhood will calm her?

Charlie takes Brooke to court

After that little crack attack last week, Brooke Mueller decided to check herself back into rehab. This was the motivation for Charlie Sheen to go for full custody of their twin sons. However, the judge denied him today.

TMZ reports the custody agreement will stay the same for the time being. He probably knows that Brooke is on drugs but somehow, Charlie is still a worse parent. You know what that means, living with Grandma!



Brooke's mom will probably end up raising these kids... SAD.

Two old people trying to have a baby

There should be a law against this.  I'm all for old people still getting it on, but not for old people trying to procreate.

Frédéric Prinz von Anhalt, the 67-year-old husband of Zsa Zsa Gabor, 94, is trying to make a baby for them through a surrogate.  The ninth husband of the Hollywood legend tells TMZ he's dropping $100,000 at a fertility clinic to make a baby from his sperm with a surrogate for he and ZZ to keeps.  So wrong.



Fréd says, "It was always my wife's dream for us to have a child ... and even though we won't be using any of her eggs, she would be thrilled to know I'm going through with this."  Oh, so she doesn't even know?  You're just going to surprise a bedridden 94-year-old elderly woman with a newborn baby one day and then call her a bad mother when she can't take care of it?  She's been in and out of the hospital for the past year, and recently had one of her legs amputated.  Sadness.



Plus, Zsa Zsa is already the mother to a grown ass woman, Constance Francesca Hilton, with Conrad Hilton.  But I guess she's not enough...

Prinz von Anhalt continues, "I am so excited!! I hope Zsa Zsa is going to hang around for awhile. I want her to see and hold the baby's hand. She will be a mother again at 95!! It was her wish to have a boy."



Well maybe it's her one regret in life that she's realized since she's been on her death bed that she never had a boy... but that's not the kind of "dream" you make come true in this situation.  How about you adopt a 30-year-old pregnant woman instead and you can make yourselves GRANDPARENTS.

Sean Penn trying to keep up with Scarlett Johansson

Either Scarlett Johansson is dating Sean Penn, or she's his new trainer.  It's OBVIOUS they're dating but they still won't confirm it.  If I were Scar-Jo, I wouldn't be jumping to admit I went from Ryan Reynolds to twice my age, 50-year-old Sean Penn either...



That means, every little thing they do together ends up becoming news.  Entertainment Tonight posted this picture of the two of them going for a yog (the j is silent) today.

Fascinating I know.  He's like, "I can't breathe, I can't breathe!"



The dumbest part is that Scarlett actually had to deny to US Weekly that she's pregnant based on this photo.  Are you kidding me?  Didn't we JUST go over this?  You can't just search desperately for a millimetre of protrusion on someone's stomach while they inhale for .2 seconds and then cry, "BABY INSIDE!!"

2 preggos out of 3

Tina Fey announced recently that she is pregnant at an Oprah show taping to air soon which then it will come off as old news.  The 40-year-old 30 Rock star debuted her baby bump in NYC last night (via US Weekly).  Cuuuute.

Tina says she let her husb Jeff Richmond knock her up again so that their 5-year-old daughter wouldn't be siblingless.  That's nice of them.



Tori Spelling has also revealed she's preggo with her and Dean Mcdermott's third bay bay.  She tweeted, "I know there's been a lot of speculation, so I wanted everyone to hear from me... Its official...Dean & I are PREGNANT!!!!"  Whoa, he's pregnant too? Crazy!

Finally, don't go calling Nicole Richie pregnant because she is pissed that anyone would think so.  A few pictures have popped up online lately of her supposed "baby bump" and that's not cool when you don't actually have a baby in there...

According to People, Nicole denies baby #3 is on the way in a statement, "Contrary to recent speculation, I am not pregnant. This irresponsible reporting continues to feed an atmosphere of self-doubt and insecurity. To publicly point out a change in anyone's body is mean-spirited and cruel. People's bodies change and change again. This is not newsworthy and is a waste of valuable media space that should be used for more important issues."



I love how she always tells the blogs and tabloids off.  I really do wish people would shut-up about other people's weight.  And that goes for "you're too skinny!" too.  RUDE.

Mariah naked again on magazine cover

Last week, Mariah Carey was grabbing her own boob on the cover of Life & Style magazine.  This week, Nick Cannon is cupping his naked, pregnant wife on the cover of OK! in the UK... probably the most action he's gotten since she became pregnant.

I love British tabloids because not only do I not know who the hell these people are half the time, they also say things like "She'll be a great MUM".  One time, I accidentally bought the UK version of Cosmo and they kept talking about "knickers"-- no lie!

Random pregnancy alert

How the hell?



Kimberly Stewart is pregnant with Benicio del Toro's baby...

A rep for the Oscar-winning actor, 44, confirms to Life & Style, "Kimberly is pregnant. Benicio is the father and is very supportive. Although they are not a couple, they are looking forward to the arrival of the baby."



That's embarrassing.  Honestly, it would be better for your image to have knocked up Paris Hilton.



You may be wondering who the F I'm even talking about here.  So here's a list of things Kimberly Stewart, 31, is known for:

• Being Rod Stewart's daughter.


• The older sister of Sean Stewart, a former patient on Celebrity Rehab.


• Paris Hilton's best friend replacement for Nicole Richie for a minute in 2005.


• Engaged to Talan from Laguna Beach at one point. He's seven years younger than her so I'm assuming it didn't work since he was still in high school.


• Getting featured on MTV Cribs while she was living in daddy's guesthouse.  So it wasn't even HER crib.

That about sums up her spoiled life.  But if you ask her she's a "designer" and a "model".  Now she'll be known as Benny's baby-mamma!  And she's probably excited about putting that on her Hollywood resumé.

Robyn of 'Sister Wives' is pregnant

Kody Brown's newest wife Robyn is expecting their first baby together / her third / the 17th child in the polygamist family.  Their TLC reality show is currently named Sister Wives but they should seriously think about changing it to '17 Kids and 4 Wives and Counting'.

Kody, 43, and fourth wife Robyn, 31, got married last year after 16 years without taking another wife.  She's totally his favorite now.  His other wifeys are Meri (the only one he's legally married to), Janelle, and Christine who have 13 of his children between them.  Robyn was married before to a dude who only wanted one wife, and they had three kids.  The newest Brown is due in October.



Kody with a K tells People, "I'm overjoyed. This connects Robyn and I together in a way that nobody can take away."  Oh they can take it away a little bit... by trying to get knocked up themselves.  "Look at me! I'm preggo too! Kody! Kody! Rub mah bellyyy. Hey bitch! Your baby is OLD NEWS."



The other women already have to compete with 16 (soon to be 17) kids and three other broads for his attention... So they make act all stoked, but deep down inside they're really like, "WHORE!!"  It still blows my mind that everyone willingly signed up for this.

K-Fed's girlfriend is having a girl

Kevin Federline says he wants to marry his pregnant girlfriend Victoria Prince when he grows the balls to ask her.

US Weekly reports the ex-husb of Britney Spears as saying, "No wedding is in the works at all," adding, "I do want to get married. But I will wait until I have the courage to propose."



Wait, you don't have the courage to propose but you had the courage to do this on national TV?







Oh by the way, Kevin and Victoria are having a girl and naming her Jordan Federline. J-Fed for short.

Mariah Carey is still pregnant

Mariah Carey is showing off where her babies live on the cover of Life & Style magazine.  And in case you didn't know what the issue is about, it's "ALL ABOUT THE BABIES!"

Good thing she didn't get a haircut recently.

K-Fed made another baby

Kevin Federline is about to become a 5th time father.  Yep, #5 is on the way with the #3 baby-mama.  So ideal.

E! News reports K-Fed's girlfriend since late 2008, Victoria Prince, is about 5 months pregnant.  This soon-to-be-born boy or girl will become a half-sibling to Federline daughter Kori, 8, and son Kaleb, 6, (with Shar Jackson) and sons Sean Preston, 5, and Jayden James, 4 (with Britney Spears).



In case you didn't realize, Kevin left Shar for Britney while Shar was pregnant with Kaleb, and Britney divorced Kevin shortly after Jayden was born... so if he sticks to his usual routine, he should get at least one more little human out of Victoria before either one of them is done.

Beckham, B. Adams and Phillippe baby news

After popping out three sons, David and 4th time pregnant Victoria Beckham have revealed to ESPN they are finally expecting a daughter.

I'm gonna laugh when it turns out this girl is a total tomboy.  Kidding, I'm sure she'll be a princess and all "girl power!" and shit.  I just had a horrible thought, PLEASE don't name her Posh!



In old man daddy news (via Reuters), Bryan Adams is going to be a first time father at the age of 51.

I guess it turns out he's been banging his personal assistant cuz she's upgraded her title to baby mama.  In a statement he says in his "Everything I Do (I Do It For You)" voice, "Alicia Grimaldi and I are expecting a baby. She helped me start my foundation years ago and it looks like she'll be running the family now."  You know it's true...



And finally, Ryan Phillippe may have knocked up a girl he was seeing (pre-Amanda Seyfried... or during I don't know...) named Alexis Knapp.  TMZ reports the two were never serious, but now she's pregnant and says he's the one who did it to her.  He's planning to do a DNA test once the baby is born in June, and if Maury Povich tells him, "You ARE the father!" he intends to provide support.

Ryan already has two children with ex-wifey Reese Witherspoon.  So obviously he knows how babies are made.